'I am intimidated by the camera'

…says A R Rahman, in a freewheeling interview about his upcoming concert film, One Heart, and directorial ambitions

Two Academy Awards, a BAFTA, two Grammys, a Golden Globe… It’s not everyday you meet a person who has them all, let alone one. AR Rahman is completing 25 years in the industry this year, and what better way to celebrate than by releasing a documentary, One Heart: The AR Rahman Concert Film, in September. 

The film has unseen behind-the-scenes footage of 16 of his most popular songs performed at his concerts. It also has in-depth interviews of the singers and musicians of those songs. “The plan was to release the film this month, but we are trying to push it to September, as Ajith’s film and a few others are coming in,” says Rahman.

The idea came up when Rahman was out touring for one of his concerts and suddenly felt a need to capture the moment. “There was so much positive energy, and I realised then I must archive such moments. A year later, when I looked at the video, I felt it could be made into a film. It’s common in other countries to release videos of concerts,” he says.

Being a private person, it wasn’t easy for him to be in the glare of a camera. “I can’t compose music in front of a camera. I get intimidated; I hate it,” he says. “A concert is fine though. And at least some people should be able to watch the film, right?”

The ace composer is used to adulation, but still, the final scenes at the end of the first screening of his film in Canada was quite something. “I noticed many shed tears. I think the film will be an unusual experience. I kept tweaking it till the last possible moment,” he says.

The film will feature songs from several languages, including Tamil, Hindi, and Punjabi. Given the sheer variety he has composed, it must not have been easy for him to choose the songs. “I have chosen those that have made me and my band proud. In Tamil, we’ve got Munbe Vaa (Sillunu Oru Kaadhal, 2006),” he says. “I wonder if language-divide matters at all. Most Hindi fans tell me they love the Tamil version of Roja. Sometimes, people are unhappy when they listen to a song from another language. But I respect all of them. I understand that some can get attached to their language or nationality. I don’t blame them.”

That’s when he turns emotional. “I don’t know if I am worthy of people’s love. I’ve always tried to stay relevant. I truly believe that the world becomes better with more music.”

Rahman’s music, in a sense, owes itself to his reticence. “I can’t really articulate all that well. I am more comfortable with silence, nights, and darkness. That’s why I prefer being a musician and let my work speak.”

He admits it was unsettling to look at himself on camera. “I was focusing a lot on the technical aspects of the video. I was very conscious...I didn’t want to look silly on camera,” he says.

The conversation veers to his upcoming projects, including Le Musk, 99 Songs, and 2.0. “I pick projects by filmmakers who can bring to screen things that I can only visualise. I loved working on Majid Majidi’s Beyond the Clouds. His thoughts blew my mind. I think we have been able to create some great music. It’s hard to find like-minded artistes who don’t mind letting go of their creative ego to create high quality work,” he says.

Rahman has no doubt that he has let go of his own ‘creative ego’. “There are directors who insist on a specific variety of songs. I can’t tell them I’ll do only my kind of music. Perhaps that’s why there are some songs that seem ill-placed in some films,” he explains. There’s a general notion that in Rahman’s music turning global, the mass-y side of him has taken a back seat. He points to Vijay’s upcoming film, Mersal and assures “It will be mass-y,”

He’s excited about Le Musk, a virtual reality film he’s directing. The idea was born during a conversation he had with his wife. “She’s fond of perfumes, and suggested that I make a film in which smell would play a big part.” The idea of making it as a VR film followed. “We have a wonderful team of international technicians and artistes who can do justice to it.”

Is he transitioning into a filmmaker slowly? “Direction takes time. It means I have to cut down on the music. I need to be convinced it’s worth my time. But yes, I have lots of ideas,” he says. “Art becomes a formula after a time, and you feel bored. A film should be a transformative experience. One Heart will take the audience straight to my studio and composing room. The ending will be quite interesting too.”

The point of One Heart was also to aid the families of ailing musicians. “Not every musician is rich and famous. I am looking to help some of the less fortunate. I know the film won’t run for 100 days, but whatever comes out of it will be used well. And I hope it makes the viewers happy,” he says.

Tuning in

I can never remember a tune. That’s why I always have my phone with me. I remember composing Jiya Jale when I was on a pilgrimage with my mom to Iraq. 

2.0 has a lot of fan following. And I can see why. Shankar is the James Cameron of India!

(The piece was originally written for The New Indian Express)